Meryl's warped desire to squeeze into a tiny pair of jeans nearly cost her life. Today she's not just proud to be big -she's getting paid for it.
Meryl's Story
"I've always been a big girl."
In high school I went from wearing a size 13/14 in Junior's to wearing a size 16 in women's clothes. This killed me mentally. I couldn't face having to shop in a plus-size store. Instead, I bought big, baggy men's jeans and button down flannel shirts. Basically, I dressed like a lumberjack.
"During my 'thin phase' I got really depressed--and really hungry."
In college I lost a lot of weight. I was studying musical theater, dancing a lot and taking Fen-Phen. I thought if I lost all this weight, I would be happier, more social, date more; I thought I would be perfect. That's not what happened. I wound up becoming totally anti-social. I didn't want to see anyone. I had no energy. I was always tired and fatigued. And, yeah, I could wear clothes that were nice but I look at pictures of myself then and I was so sad.
"Was I willing to die for the scale?"
I was diagnosed with heart valve damage. I had no choice but to go off the Fen-Phen. [The diagnosis] made me stop and ask: Why? Why am I not living my life? Why I am not eating? Why am I not happy? I decided then and there I need to turn things around, or else. I decided to enjoy myself and have a good time, no matter what. I wound up gaining all the weight back and it wasn't the worst thing in the world. I started dating and, you know what, there are plenty of men out there who like bigger women.
"Don't let your curves stop you!"
When I decided to embrace my body, I started getting my boobs back, wearing bright colors and dressing sexier. Suddenly, I felt like a beautiful woman. During this time, the show Hairspray was coming out. Finally, there was a role in a musical for a big girl. I auditioned for it but I didn't make the final cut. Still, it was a start. For the next few months, I kept missing out on roles because I was too big, too small, or too tall. All I wanted to do was perform, so I started my own group, The Glamazons. This group is an opportunity for girls who are big and beautiful to sing and dance professionally. I could not have wished for a better group than the group I have right now. We get to travel and meet all kinds of girls who are inspired by us and who are moved by what we do.
"If you're plus-size like me, show off what you have."
Dress according to your personality not your size. If you have a bright, bubbly personality, wear colors. Don't be afraid of them. Covering up your curves just makes you look bigger. Wear clothes that make you feel good about yourself and that you feel good in. I want to show the world that plus-size women can be beautiful. We shouldn't be intimidated by what the media proposes as beautiful. There are so many women out there who don't look like the models in the magazines or the actresses on TV. We should embrace ourselves and show off what we have.